It's been a while....

........Since I last posted. I am not sure if anyone is still checking in. However a little update from me on the days after.
I am still awaiting a follow up appointment with Ewa. I found my empty herb bottles, ripe for recycling the other day. It seems like a long time ago that I was brewing overnight teas and learning to dropper into my own mouth like an sick cat. My follow up will probably have to be early in October as September is already running away with me. I will let you know how this goes.
As for sugar.....I have not resumed my daily dark chocolate eating and I am still veering off some sweet foods. I am just getting used to honey again, although it feels incredibly sweet and I can only handle it in things at the moment as oppose to on breakfast stuffs. I have strangely gone off bananas, they seem very sweet and sticky and unappealing. Fruit like apples and berries has been fine. I am indifferent to fruit juice most of the time. This may all change........
I have re-introduced a few alcoholic drinks here and there, a couple of cyders and gin and tonic (although there is some debate as to whether the grains in gin are rendered null for gluten intolerance due to the distillation process or not). I can't face the fizzy crew (coke and ginger beer and things) although I have managed lemonade once or twice.
The best thing is that I think about sugary stuff whenever I consider food options for the day but I just acknowledge it and don't respond to it all the time. Sometimes I do, but to not be always considering a nibble of dark chocolate or cake is a relief. Like I mentioned before I don't want to be beholden to consuming anything except every day, except probably water! I still have an odd relationship to food where it feels more like a brain game than enjoyment but I am trying to see food as medecine and fuel, some of which should taste really good and some of which I should eat because I need it even if it tastes a little bitter or a flavour that I don't instantly love. I wouldn't force down anything really unpleasant to me, I find wrong textures impossible to overcome but weird flavours can grown on you. I am interested in the plants and food stuffs we instinctively know we need, a "gut" feeling as to what to eat, and the cravings which sometimes override these urges (which I feel are more mind-driven).
I am looking forward to having my own place and therefore a store cupboard of essentials back in my life. Day to day food shopping gets expensive. I am unsure if I cut the sugar out for long enough (one month) but I am keeping it low from now on regardless. It is nice to not have to scrutinise every single label and be a little bit more relaxed about it all. 

The Week After

The following days have been not that much different in terms of diet to the preceding four, I have however relaxed the rigour. It feels good to not be so intently concious of every food label I pick up.
I have eaten some fruit, but only English varieties like apples, pears and bilberries and a touch of honey which tasted way too sweet. I am eating some savoury foods like mayonnaise in moderation but have had no refined sugars in things such as cake, chocolate or biscuits. Avoiding these gluten free treats is quite an epic achievement for me.
Apart from the wedding day meal I have had half a square of chilli chocolate and no more. I can't face fizzy drinks at all and haven't actually wanted fruit juice at all, sticking to sparkling water in the pub and coconut water instead which is really refreshing and very low in natural sugars. I have had two glasses of elderberry wine which was gorgeous and pretty funny as I am now a complete lightweight, but otherwise I don't feel drawn to booze particularly. My digestion has been OK but its hard to say at this stage if the detox has truly worked or not. I have been living back where I was last year for 2 weeks and the diet there never agreed with me, so I'm waiting for things to settle and then see. I need to go back to see Ewa and get an update on what's improved if anything. If it really hasn't shifted, and I don't honestly expect a miracle cure, then another tack will have to be followed. I definiteley believe though that overeating any one thing for me is fatal. I realise that I have been overeating sugar for years and it has done me no good. I can bring it back in my diet now but aim to not actively seek it out. If I do this I will probably get the right amount. I need to see food now more as nourishment and not a source of oral pleasure primarily. I also recognise that sweet treats and snacking plugs emotional gaps rather than actually give my body what it needs. The key is certainly to enjoy my food and not get obsessed by diet and I'm hoping to be housed pretty soon and stop moving around as this has made planning and eating generally much harder. So there will be some more updates on the days after and thanks again to everyone for words of encouragement and interesting insights shared. 

Days 25 - 30 The Final Chapter.......Or is it?..................

Days 25 - 30
I am once again rolling five days' experience into a block, partly due to my stone age laptop's interface with this neolithic wi-fi and also because you probably don't need a blow by blow account of every single day.
I am surprised to feel at this stage of the game some peaks and troughs of tiredness still. I believe this is chiefly governed by how much water I drink and not maintaining protein levels properly. I stress that this is what works for me, and you may be different. I already have certain food intolerances which make my diet convoluted at times. I have taken to carrying bags of nuts, almonds, cashews and walnuts mainly, around with me and rotating which ones I eat each day. I have been advised to avoid "mould" nuts and all dried fruits as "mould" carrying food stuffs but I have to be honest and say I am not entirely sure what this means. Something may be lost in translation from the Polish. I hope that the sugar detox may even improve my intolerancesin the longer term. Yeeha.
I now have a confession to make and am including it as an interesting (if only to me) insight into my own relationship with habits, cravings and my pleasure centres in my brain. About 10 days into this detox I had a tobacco relapse and have been smoking on and off throughout. Nooooooooooo! I hear you squeak. How unhealthy. How un-detoxy-acceptable in a health kind of a way. Yessssssssssss. I hear you and I will be getting back off them pronto. I can only put this down to a teenagery kind of a sulk about not having any "treat" (sweet) foods and feeling like I need to indulge a part of me that I can't put my finger on. The detox has made me realise that I don't need to indulge parts of me every bloomin day and what am I trying to comfort by doing that anyway? Its a misnoma as its not solving anything, comforting long term or nourishing my body to actually feel well. Going to stuff sugary snacks or slosh back wine or toot on a fag are all short term pleasure hits with no real substance. We all know this anyway. I am trying to take a longer term vision with food, looking at it over whole days or even weeks now to see if I can get the right nutrition in. I hasten to add I am not achieving this. However looking beyond "the next meal" can help to maintain energy over longer periods and make me feel more able to take on the day. At 36 I recognise and feel that I do not have the juice I had at 26 and better food stuffs will just help me truck on more efficiently without being frustrated at this. My energy levels can be very variable and bottom out sometimes so keeping things steady is important to me. Knocking out sugar, despite mid afternoon crashes from time to time, has given me a much steadier and more constant energy available throughout the day. The reason that I mention the smoking relapse is that normally when I do this it puts me back on a (double stupid points here) rota with my asthma inhaler. Over these three weeks I have not used it once despite smoking. It is summer and warm and dry, in the damp of winter it is always worse. I am not using this as carte blanche to now become a professional smoker, yet I cannot help but feel that something is happening regarding sugar here. Without sugar inhaler unnecessary. Why is this? The stomach and the lungs are linked in terms of wellbeing and problems in one area can fire off problems in another. What really are the knock on effects of sugar on other areas of the body? Can it really cause poorer breathing in an asthmatic or is that just crazy talk?
The final day of my detox was my friend's wedding and I had already decided to enjoy the wedding meal and one or two drinks. The savoury lunch tasted amazing as I had salad dressing and a carrot and rice concoction with raisins for the first time in a while. A friend made a lemon polenta cake and it was gluten free, so I cut a piece in half and caved in to that with a few strawberries. The hand fasting also finished with a glass of elderflower fizz.The glass of bubbles came first in the day's proceedings and did taste fantastic, the second half glass just tasted sweet and underwhelming. Throughout the day I felt up and down and kept dashing to the kitchen for water. I have drunk a lot of water throughout the detox and it has been important. I have dabbled with hot and cold showering in alternation and wanted to do body brushing. I am still without a permanent base to live, currently the showers where I am are broken, so this has not been possible to keep up but I would recommend it for anyone trying a similar detox for whatever reason to shift stuff on through.
The weddding day was long and there is always much socialising which is also tiring in a good way but the energy ups and downs were frustrating and didn't make me glad to be back on sweet stuff, although the flavours in the foods were hugely welcome. My excursions on the dance floor were brief and flaily but no real change there.......I am actually glad to not be drinking bitter herbs three times a day and sprinkling tintcures on my tongue. The herb tea had to be made up the night before carefully and covered. My last brew ended up with a bar of soap falling into it, evidence enough that I was done with that ritual.
I have decided to slowly re-introduce native fruits into my diet, like apples and pears and berries and a little honey. This morning I had bilberry gluten free flat breads (gorgeous) with fruit harvested on Dartmoor yesterday. I want to stay off refined sugar for longer. I would like to keep updating the blog for another month as to how I feel and also as to the outcome of my second meeting with Ewa to see if the parasite has cleared properly or not. I am fully open to referral to a tropical disease unit to see what is going on if not. Conventional medecine can be useful in equal measures and I am under no illusions as to this being a miracle cure. However my stomach has generally settled and does feel less like it directs my life which is a boon. I also felt at times that my energy on the detox may not be up to full power excerise but I went to the pool in Exeter on Friday and swam a mile comfortably so that was reassuring.
I have realised I can get by on less food generally and not panic. I still do not like to go for long periods food-less (ideally 8 hours maximum) so I am not sure I could ever fast effectively. However it is good to realise I can physically eat less and be fine, I just need to plan well. I am looking forward to the potential prospect of a base in September so I can take better control of my diet and hopefully make it less of a spiky, prominent feature of my life, just something I see to like everyone else. I do not give up things for Lent or Ramadan (although I believe my detox may have overlaid part of Ramadan) but it has been an experience and an adventure. At times it has been a very frustrating and emotional journey, quite literally feeling like death. The height of summer was certainly the time to crack on with it, but a July heatwave was not the easiest choice. The denial of what I thought was essential a really important journey. I invite anyone who says "I couldn't do without", (insert - tea/coffee in the morning, biscuit at 11am or whatever) to do just that. Being tied to things which we don't know for certain we will always have is not helpful. Everything in life moves, changes, grows and eventually dies. Letting go of things allows other things to move in and inhabit the space. It doesn't mean you can't maybe have those things back, but its fascinating to see what takes up the space instead......
I hope you have enjoyed bits of the blog so far and thank you to everyone who has got in touch and shared their thoughts and experiences with me. The blog will go on, for now, and so will I.

Days 22-25 Entering the Final Phase

So I am going to roll these days into one......I am brinking on the final phase of the detox. I am looking forward to fruit being back in the game. The bitter herbs are getting a little tired now, and the novelty of splashing tinctures has passed. There have been no major cravings and I got through my weekend of work where I average 13 hours a day, so that's good. I didn't bottom out like last weekend.
This morning (Day 25) I have a crasher of a headache but that could be the tiredness too. Otherwise my energy is doing OK. I will be interested to see Ewa again and find out which aspects of the detox have been successful. I will certainly be staying off the processed sugar for a while longer, although I will have a little of something on Saturday at my friend's wedding. Nothing major or vastly wild to report so I'm going to keep it short and ....ha ha sweet........

Days 20 and 21 - Cruise Control

Day 20
Felt pretty good today. Planned ahead food wise as I was out for most of the day. Finished up with a nice bivvie out in the wilds of outer Bath with my partner. It was strangely relaxing to not really take much food or worry about emergency bathroom moments. Just loads of water. No yearnings for sweet stuff, although I do still yearn after fruit and look forward to its return. Friends who have done the paleo diet say that it tastes really sweet after being without for some time and it will hopefully be enough to satisfy me once the official thirty days of detoxing are over.
This time period has made me have a real re-think about the sweet treats that I eat and why I indulge in them. It certainly fills both an emotional and a physical gap. Its also pretty lazy. I plan to stay off them for longer than my official 30 day detox. I plan to gradually re-introduce fruit and then honey and then go from there. Its true that in the longer term avoiding all savoury foods with sugar in would be a real challenge and re-shape many things like eating out and dinners with friends. Eating just whatever savouries you normally do will probably provide enough sugar if it has had any kind of processing however healthy it looks. My friend Simona is vegan and has emailed about her difficulties with finding food on the hop when she is hungry that is actually healthy. She said motorway services are particularly useless. I have really wondered (for those of us who are either car drivers or lift sharers which is most of us) where the wisdom lies on this. Driver's pit stops are simply laden with overpriced junk, sugary food and coffee. Cars weigh about a tonne and people jump in them to spin round often half asleep. Why are the main places to stock up for a reviving travel snack just filled with rubbish? Its ridiculous. They are certainly one of the easiest places for people to grab junk, particularly people on the move for work from salesmen to musicians.You have to do what I have termed the "Walk of Will", where you avoid eye contact with all sorts of brightly coloured tempting packages. Everyone deserves to be able to access healthy foods without this plethora of kak or paying 7 quid for a full plate of hot food at a services that is probably a baked potato and salad and won't do much for you either. Incidentally my sister's husband you can now buy pre-baked potatoes with toppings for re-heat. What planet Janet?

Day 21
Started the day with a river swim. What a winner. Pretty chilly by the time we hoisted out and the sun broke through to turn our fingers back from white to pink. Bit hungry but able to decamp to Bath for a bite to eat. Ate quite light with a bit of meat. Yesterday and today I found I got the 4pm energy dip. It seems directly proportional to how much meat and nuts I eat. I don't ever really buy meat and have not been endeared when I recently bought fish and chicken from a well know retailer. The fish was not fresh (that was when my housemates commented) and the chicken was off on its sell by when I opened it. I had bought it as it was organic, so not impressed. The fish I later discovered was also caught EITHER by "line, net or trawl". For anyone interested in fish issues The End of the Line documentray makes depressing viewing. Line catching is perceived as a good option. However the lines are miles long and baited at intervals. Sea faring birds such as the endangered albatross dive for the baits and get caught and die. Net catch hauls in a variety of unfortunate marine life, no matter what they say about sizes of net hole to let smaller fish out. I have witnessed this at grass roots level when I went out on a small traditional Sri Lankan fishing bought. We accidentally caught several things that were dead by the time entangled, one of them a beautiful Dragon Fish. Trawling as if anyone needs to know, uses huge metal rakes to literally scrape the sea bed bringing up everything in its way and leaving the equivalent of desertification on the ocean floor. So the idea that actually fish is a "healthy" option over red meat is deeply questionable for me. Just because we don't see fish in fields and they are not cute or furry it is still a very thorny ecological issue. I am trying to re think it at the moment although I don't eat alot of fish.
Food purchasing it seems to me is a real minefield. We are turned into scholars at the supermarket reading endless labels to avoid certain nasties or additives. We are faced with "local or global" food issues. I love rice but it travels thousands of miles to me around the world and I don't know much about workers rights in these countries or conditions in the paddy fields. Or environmental impacts. I read that it takes 140 litres of water to produce one cup of coffee grown to the new "full sun" more intensive method of farming. Higher yields are produced but at what cost? Shade grown coffee (literally utilising the shade from surrounding forest trees) is more sustainable, yet produces a lower yield. It supports more biodiversity. The coffee flavour is supposedly better too. Guatemala can be a good area for this and also for coffee dried on tables in the traditional style. Try to fins out where your coffee comes from and support traitional growing methods. Something else I have learned recently is that the western world's ongoing interest in buying quinoa has driven up prices in the countries where it naturally grows and now local people can't afford it. I believe as far as possible local is always best but sometimes just not achievable without huge effort and commitment. I fall short of the grade I know. Do we have the time or the patience to unpick these issues? Can we use more of our "wasted" space in cities to grow food. Personally I think we should look at going up. There is plenty of available wall space and for me vertical gardens in cities may be the future. Check out this website where walls are no barrier to greening. Patrick Blanc has got some very cool ideas. http://www.verticalgardenpatrickblanc.com/
I have certainly gone off the point about sugar, but my point is that f we had more fresh fruit and veg available to us that we could freely harvest around towns and cities without waiting a week for a veg box to arrive we could eat healthily on the hop and start to re-shape our eating habits..........

Day 19 - All Good

Today I have felt most agreeable, no crazy mood swings and despite eating lightly no hunger traumas. I did cook some haddock for lunch and despite opening the back door still managed to waft the kitchen out. This didn't endear me to my housemates but I don't think they are too concerned. Fish and green veg, keep it coming. I did some good walking around town and had a pretty productive day. Did have a five minute dream about having a glass of mead sometime in August and accidentally but some sugar granules in my flat bread thinking it was sugar as it was in a small bowl next to a packet of salt. But hey, we do the best we can. Also discovered that gluten free oatcakes have palm fruit oil in them, why oh why oh why.....Probably to help preserve them or something...Onwards and upwards......

Day 18 - Sweet Salt

So, I said I would produce a few tidbits of info on the ole sweet salt. But before I do I should mention that my "6 cashew nut butter crackers incident" on Saturday night had me waking up at 5am on Sunday morning feeling quite naseous. That'll learn me..........
The English word sugar can be traced back through the Arabic and Persian languages to a root in Sanskrit, "surkara". It is likely that Italian merchants first brought it to these shores, but it is believed that the first place it was domesticated was New Guinea around 8 000 BC. It seems that India and other parts of south east Asia were the natural home of sugar cane where it favoured the warm climate and plenty of rain. Sugar cane was chewed for its sweetness. I can clearly remember being around 6 or 7 at school, when a girl, whose father worked on a sugar cane plantation, brought in a thick, bamboo-like stick of sugar cane for us all to try. Far more exciting than grabbing a bag of Tate and Lyle and I remember feeling like a monkey or something. In a liquid form sugar couldn't travel far. With the discovery of how to crystallise the sweet one came the ability to transport sugar over greater distances and for it to be kept for longer. Indian sailors carrying this sweet treat and ghee traversed trade routes spreading it wider and travelling Buddhist monks are said to have taken crystallised sugar into China. Crusaders brought home sugar after their trips to The Holy Land and Christopher Columbus apparently returned with an armload in the fifteenth century too after a fling on his travels.
Before the eighteenth century sugar was considered a luxury item in the UK and by the nineteenth century this had shifted to it being classed as a necessity. The drive for sugar supplies at this time helped to power forward colonisation of tropical lands to provide the growing space for the crop. In the early days the labour was back breaking and hard, without the machinery to make the job simpler and many Europeans refused to do it. I am skipping lots of detail here but, as you have guessed the labour was sourced in the worst way imaginable by shipping in slave labour from West Africa. Millions worked the plantations, their natural resistance to malaria and other tropical diseases did nothing to dissuade the traders from shipping yet more to places such as Barbados and Jamaica to fuel the industry. Many died thousands of miles from their homeland. So the history of sugar production is a dirty one for sure. During the Napoleonic wars, sugar beet began to be grown in Europe, as the shipping blockades were making it harder for supplies to get in. In the UK however we continued to import from colonies in the West Indies, India and other areas.
The 5 largest producers of sugar in 2011 were Brazil, India, the European Union, China and Thailand.
In 2008 the average per capita consumption of sugars and sweetners in the US weighed in at around 62 kg a year. (There is 2.2 pounds to a kg). So that's just over 2kg a month which is very roughly half a kilo a week (or just over a pound in weight a week. I imagine weighing it at Scoopaway). I think that is pretty hefty. This figure apparently didn't include any artificial sweetners either.
The average yearly consumption per person worldwide of sugar is estimated at 25 kg by 2015, so just 18 months away. Perhaps it is these kinds of figures that Coca Cola have had to closely consider when in January of this year they issued a statement to the tune of "we might be overdoing it and obesity is a li'l bit of an issue" as it became clear to all who didn't already know that several spoonfuls of sugar in each can was beyond overkill. A cry back to 1903 when the same company were forced to admit cocaine on their list of ingredients and that this might be a bit detrimental to public health too.............

Days 15,16 and 17 - Ups and Downs

Day 15
Decide to take it steady again today. The morning involves the usual doses of herbal tea. I have experimented trying to make this ahead of time in case I am away overnight camping but the resultant brew is pretty rank if left out of the fridge. Force it down to not waste the herbs. Think, not for the first time, that it looks like I am drinking herb pee.
I spend the afternoon on an excursion to a swim spot near Bath with my sister kids and friends. The sun is out, the great British public are happy and camped out practically on top of each other at the small grassy area and no-one seems to mind. I am armed with cashew nuts and cucumber and a pack of plain crisps. Not balanced but a fine mini picnic that will mean I don't sink in the water with my niece in her armbands.
Later meet friends for an evening out. Being outdoors is fine but migrating to the pub later is a bore on the drinks front. I cannot be bothered to cue in a very hot bar for a sparkling water so loiter outside with my water bottle instead. Being surrounded by drunken rowdies is pretty dull too. When you are not drinking you notice that drinkers are less attractive, louder and at worst very repetitive and boring. Luckily this doe snot apply to my compadres but I am glad to exit planet dust and return to my sister's where the fire wok is crackling in the garden instead. Have to turn down some Icelandic liquor but have a sniff instead. Moods are up and down, ranging from fine to very much not fine. My partner Simon is being really supportive from afar as are my sister and her family.

Day 16
Early exit at 7am to hit Ledbury for work. A writer from the Independent is reviewing our company, so our impending group of women on a bushcraft hen weekend are proving slightly more nerve wracking than normal. I spent yesterday morning pre-cooking food for the weekend. Last time I did a minimal amount of this, cooking on site. Although I had a better choice of food stuffs this time around, energy wise I didn't seem to do much better. Its a long day - roughly 8am to 10pm and by 8pm I hit a wall. Earlier I had troughed cashew nut spread delights on corn cakes. Started with 2, ended up as 6. I tried to convince myself it was the protein in them, but I think their naturally sweet taste was sucking me in. Felt a bit fragile at points during the day, when my boss asked me to re-pack the cold boxes that we use due to lack of refridgeration in the woods I squeaked "No give me another job! Anything!" or words to that effect, in a fairly irrational sounding manner. I later explained that my life consists of a lot of packing - re-packing and bag hauling at the moment and I had reached my limit. This has happened a few times over the last month. Got to bed at 9.45pm. I literally lay and didn't move, ususally a sign that I have had it. Didn't even get ear plugs in to drown out the music and the rain and didn't even hear either anyway. I did all I could in terms of food today but our women came indoors tonight as oppose to being out around the fire, due to the rain, and this is always more tiring. It can be very odd to witness a group of people getting wonky when you are on detox and clear headed.

Day 17
Manage to undercook boiled eggs for me and my boss for breakfast and in so doing put myself off them. At times I have over eaten them for breakfast, a meal which I often find a challenge in the gluten and dairy free world without fruit on the menu too. My digestion is a little bizarre again, colourful is all I will say. Energy feels a bit better, but generally spaced out and a bit anxious which could be rooted in several things right now. The day goes well and the group have seemed content all weekend. At the end my boss is pleased so that's good and I have enjoyed everyone's company. I also road tested a new hedgerow recipe today which went well.
I would like to feel a little more upbeat again and have a lighter approach to life but it all seems to be life admin for me right now so I just have to suck it up. Facilitating for groups requires loads of energy (I really do not know how you teachers, Jasmine and Claire, do it day in and day out - hats off to you) and I have used up quite a bit of battery reserves. There is a fatigue element to my situation that I need to manage. Felt a little bored of considering food choices constantly all over again for the coming week and yearned for a bit of chocolate.
Got back at 9pm but motivated myself to knock up a soup with avocado and gluten free baraks (flat breads) on the side. Tiredly missed my mouth with the tinctures and got the herbs brewed up for the morning. Feel OK tonight. I tried a shamanic journey in the peace and quiet of the site after everyone had left earlier. Felt quite hard to do as the rain came pouring in and I convinced myself  a tree could fall in the squall on the bell tent. I noticed some "stuckness", areas of discomfort to work through but realised it was going to take more than one journey to work it through. It was a beginnning, and they always lead somewhere.....

Days 13 and 14 - Nearer the middle bit

Day 13
Still waking up with lots of tiredness, the initial feeling is that I haven't really slept that much but I know I have. Once I drag myself up I come around after a bit, but I am used to feeling quite awake in the morning.
The cravings appear to have subsided and I notice that I am actually looking for the flavours in the things that I eat more. Usually there is some condiment lathered on the side or something else to distract my taste buds. I believe that sugar has a numbing effect on the mind as well as the taste buds. Sugar makes me lazy for flavour, once I've tasted that I am less interested in other things. I remember my mum saying "Don't eat a biscuit you'll spoil your dinner!" and I'd reply "But I'm really hungry! I'll still eat everything". I think the situation is more that once I had eaten a sweet biscuit I would lose interest in the taste of her savoury food, sugar has that effect.
I spend the day in the woods, with provsions to last the day. Its nice and cool and despite being a sacrificial victim to mosquitoes and horse flies I spend the day trying to make fire with a bow drill and making nettle cordage. These craft activities are effective at taking my mind off the food situation and there is not an ice cream van to be heard. As I am making a bad job of splitting some wood a barefoot man and a dog spring out of nowhere and it turns out he teaches primitive fire making. He makes an ember with my kit, reassuriung me that the kit at least isn't duff. I however still have a long way to go to get it. Mood is pretty low today as it was Tueday and Monday so try to keep on through although I feel pretty rubbish.

Day 14
Make a conscious effort to buy different nourishing food stuffs and give my head a break. I have been thinking constantly about finding a place to live as despite four different possibles, they all have fallen through for different reasons, nothing has born fruit yet.  I want a place to be pretty badly now despite it being great to spend time with my sister's family. Anna comes around in the morning on her way to Starry Skies and offers some advice and helpful words on the sugar thing. I spend the morning bashing nettles and stripping fibres to make more cordage. I make a small bracelet, not a grand work of art, and also a new drum beater with a sycamore handle and cordage to tie the soft leather at the top. Again its a starting point but I find that the craft activities help with the busy head. This could be lack of sugar but also lots to sort out over the coming months. Make a special effort with food today and feel much better by the end of the day with tofu, leafy greens, nuts and seeds. I am getting used to no condiments something I thought would never happen. My bathroom trips....suffice to say that what I am experiencing comes in colours that are not overly familiar. Hopefully this means that the herbs and tinctures are working....we'll see......Spend the evening making a fire in the wok and attempting unusual cooking methods for my bushcraft weekend ahead. We are being reviewed by The Independent....... The food is edible I would say only in a survival situation. Good job I have road tested it. Think about my friend's wedding which falls just at the end of the detox and make a note to take it easy on whatever food stuffs are available and to eat just a small amount of anything not savoury. 

Days Eleven and Twelve - The Middle Bit

Day Eleven
So I exaggerate its true. Eleven and twelve are not half way to thirty (days). Please humour  me; I have had no sugars or fruit sugars or any type of sugar as far as is humanly possible for 12 days now and quite frankly its a right bore. It is the longest I have ever gone in my whole human life without sugar. I yearn for cool fruit drinks and ice lollies. Time for yet another herbal tea......
Yesterday I was tired, however I had worked a 28 hour weekend so it is hard to apportion what is down to diet and how much is down to work. I felt very grumpy again and quite frustrated.
Meal wise it would be easier if I had a long term settled base to work from and could plan all my meals in advance. It is certainly costing me more to buy what I perceive to be more luxury food items such as nut butters, coconut oil, a variety of nuts and other things. I navigate the day like I am on a hand driven pedalo; going forwards after a fashion unable to travel significant distances.

Day Twelve
Getting up over the last couple of months has been periodically hard, I have been feeling tireder than when I went to bed. This morning was like this. I always find it odd that I don't leap out of bed when the sun shines in the summer but its all part of the process I feel
I visit my osteopath near Park Street and get suddenly hungry afterwards. Go in to Tesco Extra Rubbish Stores as there is nowhere else around except wheat-sugar-caffeine temples (cafes). Pick over all the options. Small box of sushi, surely OK as its just rice and vegetables and fish right? WRONG. The sushi is cooked with sugar so its out. There's nowt else except veggies and plain crisps which are OK. Mutter and purchase standard pot of houmous. Later on and nearer to home in Easton I go to the Sweet Mart and spy a gluten free "Clive's Pie", just one left. Huzzah! At the last moment I do an ingredients check.....so far....so good.....until......reading with one eye open as I can't bear to look........sugar......utter bollox.
So my newly created word just for this special occasion is tedioso. An ongoing kind of tedium with no immediate end. Well 18 days if I am honest, it just feels like a life time. Mercifully I have no significant bashes or weddings to attend until the end of the detox. I would have to shun the meal and party on sparkling water. Wild times.
My "helpful" top tip for today is - don't try to live long term in this country without gluten, dairy and sugar you may just go mad. This isn't to say sugar doesn't rule the world but we are obsessed with wheat and dairy products. I remember moving to Cornwall, land of the cream tea, pasty and pint and wringing my hands assuming that on every corner there would be a handy fisherman peddling mackerel. Yet fresh fish was damn hard to get hold of alot of the time. As the Kernow boys would say "What's occurrin?'"
Supermarkets are not helpful. In Sainsbury's last night I noticed the extent of the problem. Sugary Booze - 1 aisle, Fizzy Drinks - 1 aisle, Chocolate and Biscuits - 1 aisle, Crisps - at least 1/2 aisle, Sugar and sugar themed baking goods  - 1 aisle, Environmentally Damaging Cleaning Products - 1 aisle.........."World foods" (what things like rice you can actually eat) 3/4 aisle. It beggars belief. We are a nation of junk food eaters. Another whole aisle was probably bad frozen meals and ice cream but I stopped counting. Yes that start with a vegetable aisle to convince you it is a good wholesome healthy store. I hereby set you all a challenge. When next in a supermarket (we all do it) go straight to the booze aisle.....and drink all the gin. No seriously, go to the booze aisle first and work backwards finishing with the veg and fruit. Firstly you will probably spend less. Secondly you too will be wowed by the plethora of rubbish you don't want to eat. Thirdly you may want to shop elsewhere.
For sugar free go to whole food shops all the way if you can. One challenge with these is that the meat is extremely expensive in them and protein is a must. However you will find whole foods. Get together with your friends and bulk buy from Essential. Good quality food is surely a basic right for us in this day and age yet we are presented with endless rubbish. I am not the junk food police, I love a Snickers with the best of them. I just believe the way we think, feel and behave is deeply affected by this stuff and our long term health suffers. Who wants to be ill? We hopefully all want to live long productive lives and see our grandkids emerge. I feel like some kind of sugar detective, mystery shopping for uncontaminated items, but they are literally everywhere. How and when and why did sugar end up in everything that we are eating? Is this OK?

Days Seven, Eight, Nine and Ten

Day 7
I have been on the road and working away in Devon and Ledbury. I don't have one of those bling phones so here I am back at my laptop recapping the last four detox days.....
Day seven was OK, supplemented by sausages for breakfast and chicken featured later in the day. It seems meat is helpful for energy first thing in the morning. I am conscious that I would not want meat every day for breakfast but its interesting to see how different I feel with an animal protein based meal to start the day. Some days I mix two types of protein, with eggs also or houmous.
The day is scorchio in Devon and my nerves at being tasked with an excitable bunch of 7 year olds for outdoor activities is over-riding any other sensations from the detox. Drink plenty of water. Feel mildly panicked. Almonds get me through mid afternoon. The day goes off pretty well. My kids group finish with a small performance for the other groups where we make fans out of cabbage leaves and wave courgettes around......
Day 8
Another scorchio day. Four of us are stood out in the midday sun dressed as an old man and 3 old women respectively, (replete with wigs and beards) acting out a version of the stone soup story. To add insult to injury we are all surrounding the soup....on an open fire.....Hilarious and ridiculous at the same time. The narrator directs us. We sweat and cackle.
Heat is reducing energy levels. Only a slight headache first thing which clears. Lunch is a bit rubbish, just some veg and a few olives. Deal with it and embrace 3 and a half hour journey by car on mainly motorways with no cold air blowers in the 2 o'clock sun. Windows down and semi deaf me and Simon yell over the wind. Much water is going down. Ready salted crisps are my occasional "treat". Wow. Very tired by end of day but working with young kids and the heat has more to do with it than anything. Glad to sleep after simple dinner of tofu, veggies and tamari. Not at my shiniest best but appreciate the moon and cold bucket wash before bed.
Day 9
I am working all weekend so apologise for the lack of sugar research I have provided thus far.
Energy levels alright, no changes or noticeable dips. No headaches today. The body aches were brief, but the headaches fade in and out. No other tangible ill effects. I have attempted to plan food for the weekend, fairly difficult with two days to cover outdoors with no fridges here. My work normally sorts food, but for the next 3 weekends I have to supplement my meals as a few bits are OK but most isn't. My diet is a challenge for me, let alone our long suffering chef. Fare OK today. Feel a little low in mood but nothing serious. Slept well last night but had crazy dreams. The same goes for tonight. Could be the tinctures, could be the moon, could be the woods.....Who knows. Still drinking lots of water. Got bored with herbal tea and drank a little black coffee which isn't restricted on this regime. I emphasise this isn't a health kick as such. Its an anti-parasite kick. Don't feel as exhausted mainly because the day was overcast and offered some respite.
Day 10
Sunday 7am I arise. Really can't be arsed. I gather twigs for my wild fire workshop. I do a sit spot in the woods and check in with myself. Feel better. Today I experience a teenage boredom at the foods available to me. More vegetables and tofu and tamari and a bean thing with rice. As a quick reminder I am off all gluten (inc rye and spelt and oats), dairy and sugar. And I live in England. What a bore. Unless you are a posh hippy and can spend 50 quid at The Better Food Company this food situation could get well repetitive. Its amazing how you can be so optimistic, but I can still have THIS and THIS and THIS...yet the reality is the THIS's suck a bit because I am a kid of the monster munch generation and whilst these were banned in my house we still grew up on reams of doughnuts, penguins, club biccies and drank as much ribena as we could lay our hands on. Sugar was right in there, centre stage like Nicole Kidman in Moulin Rouge. I am also a product of the "Endless Choice" era of the 21st Century. "But I FEEEL like eating this, although these lovely perfectly good foods are at my disposal I FEEEEL like this and its all got sugar somewhere in it dagnammit".
I miss condiments for extra pzazz and breakfast is relegated to eggs, occasional sausages (I am not a huge fan), bacon, houmous and veg or nuts. No fruit as a snack is a major blow. Its probably just running around after people all weekend, sorting their food and then having to cook mine separately and to a duller outcome that's hacking me off. "It's just like being a mum!" I hear some of you cry. Most probably.
I can see why vegans live with vegans and the like.... just being surrounded by food stuffs you can't eat constantly / or find distasteful can get a bit much. I eye up a packet of marshmallows leftover from another woodland group. I shut the lid on the box.
"The sugar cravings go after a few days", state many sources. No they bloomin' well don't reports this source. Mood swings are to be expected so perhaps I am entering the extremely grumpy stage. There is no way to cut loose on this diet. I feel like taking up smoking again. What a fantastic side effect. I clearly have a slightly addictive personality. Opt for the rest of the bean stew for dinner with a totally unhealthy portion of chips on the side. No condiments. Drink more water. Throw tinctures into mouth. (I've advanced and can now do this without the mirror). Sulk like a teenager.

Day Six - It's nearly a week

So I approach one quarter of the way through my detox. I awoke early in confusion but that was partly because I dreamt the kids I was teaching turned into adults half way through the session. I naturally became concerned I'd pitched my activities a bit low. The adults were frowning and muttering. My new friend also excitedly asked me via text if I wanted to attend some microbial workshop where you get to take some critters away with you at the end in a jar. I am still not sure what I would do with them but nonetheless see the irony in evicting one lot of miniature life forms and then importing another home.......All a bit much at 7am......
Still somewhat achey and tireder than I should be first thing but the headaches have lessened today. I paced myself, took two twenty minute walks and managed not to fall asleep at 3.30pm by eating some nuts as advised by Anna.
My tea jar is travelling happily around. I'm getting better at throwing tinctures in my mouth.
I did have a moment this morning at about 11.30am whilst reading about the garden at Findhorn, Scotland. The woman I am house sitting for is up there so I thought I would read up a bit about it. People in the book describe growing in harmony with nature spirits, devas and about the inner workings of the spirits of the plants. I started crying. Either it struck a chord or I am just about to blub at every trash magazine headline I see for the next three weeks. I''ll get back to you on that.....
Gluten / Sugar / Dairy free lunch of the day
Cabbage, red onion, brocolli, tomato, sesame seeds, sunflower seeds and tamari cooked together in coconut oil in a wok. A tin of mackerel in olive oil on the top. Surprisingly tasty.
Note re: cookings oils. According to certain sources the only oils which are stable enough to withstand high temperatures of cooking are coconut oil, butter and ghee.
So olive oil, vegetable oil and sunflower oil contrary to belief are not great for you if you cook with them. I understand that coconut oil is not local and maybe not sustainable as a long term choice but we use these substances daily. If you want to know why these oils are bad you'll have to get researching. The scientists and dieticians amongst you come forth! The joy of the Tinterweb. I'm just here to plant ideas.......

Day Five - Aches and Naps

The toxins must be movin and a groovin. I have mild headaches and a strong urge to take an uncommon mid afternoon nap. I feel vaguely confused but that could be the heat too. Mild body aches along arms and legs also occur. I manage to have a productive day anyway.....Strangely my craving today is for honey. It is infrequent but strong. I accept that I clearly have an addiction and yes its not to crack but it is nonetheless disconcerting.
I have gently browsed the shelves of the Co-Op supermarket and Tesco to find non-sugary foods and discovered sugar in these unlikely places......Moroccan cous-cous salad tub, plain beetroot salad tub, tomato and lentil soup (chilled in a pot, the fresh kind), sausage rolls, coleslaw, margherita pizza and basil pesto. It creeps in everywhere. Its strange to think how much of it we consume before we even attempt to nibble a biscuit. According to Wikipedia, the issue of sugar consumption and related human illnesses has been considered since the end of the 20th Century. However one of the main reasons that scientific research has proved inconclusive on the subject is the difficulty in securing a test group. This means that a society or group where sugar forms no part of the diet is next to impossible to find. This is worrying.
I contact my friend Anna who I know has cut sugar out of her diet for long periods of time. She gives me helpful advice on what to snack on, times of potential energy dips and how to combat them, the importance of a few protein-focused breakfasts each week amongst other useful things. She kindly offers emotional support too as this is apparently another side effect of knocking out sugar. I am glad its summer and eating light is easy. Luckily I stuffed loads of fruit (a premonition) two weeks before this detox so I am not missing summer fayre too much. 

Day Four - Remember to Eat

I awake very tired. I have to stay put for a while longer despite my best intentions for an early rise. Feel hammered and I have had no alcohol to drink. Unwisely skip breakfast but eat fish and raw veg for lunch. Vow not to make a habit of skipping meals. I eat meat, potato and cabbage grandma style for dinner. The cravings are manageable today. On this day I  miss most not having drinks with flavours like fruit juices or cordials although I don't regularly buy these things. Maybe its just the heat, but at the end of it all water is the matrix of life and what we need the most. However right now all drinks feel a little mild and dull. Summertime seems to support my de-tox month as you can eat light but it does mean no cyder in the pub garden and no ice lollies down the park with my neice. But it is worth it I know in the long run. Snacking is also a bit limited to nuts and houmous until I get my creative thinking hat on more firmly. Good excuse not to snack! I hear you say. I guess this month tells me as much about how I eat as what I eat, and snack culture is encouraged in this country. People stroll along crunching crispsat bus stops, chewing pasties on the pavements and slugging cans on the hoof. It's normal. So I am not alone.
I need to sleep again for a bit late afternoon. I remind myself that I am making an environment the parasite won't like so it leaves. I've been trying to visualise my parasites. On day one they appeared strangely as party creatures all wearing straw hats and dancing to the lambada. On day two they were definitely still partying, this time in beach wear to the tune of Copa Cobana. I think they are happy to be acknowledged. Yesterday they felt sluggish and gloopy. Maybe its the weather. Today I am not aware what they are doing. Maybe sleeping off their hangovers. Anyway, before you think I have totally lost it I am off home to bed and not via the late night garage.....

Day Three - Cravings Reduce

Parts of yesterday afternoon I can only describe as "tweaky". This will make sense to some of you and not others. Everything felt quite bright and in sharp relief. I felt that my system was starting the process of clearing itself out. I am still apprehensive but hopeful. I guess I felt a sort of intermittent high, which is common when toxins begin to shift. Maybe the sugar is leaving the system now, I don't know how long this takes so I will find out. I certainly felt energised and found myself skipping across fields. When you know the sea is the other side it helps. Wild camping however was curtailed as my partner was ravaged by a hideously painful ear infection. Our attempts to get to woodland turn into fantasies of pina coladas by a pool somewhere and it becomes apparent that we need easier lodgings than a forest floor. We are both well warmed by the day and fading fast.
We divert to Totnes and I trot around in the hot July night looking for a cool room for the night for us. It proves challenging. Its summer and everywhere is full. The situation is starting to feel biblical and I resist asking if there is a manger free. The situation comes to a head when, lost, I ask a man on a mobility scooter for directions and he proclaims undying love and starts to chase me. I pick up the pace to a fast walk and like some classic zombie film I outwalk him. The road is mercifully on a hill. But its still bastard hot and I curse roundly. I retrieve Simon from the car and steer him up the road into an Indian to re-fuel and bask in the air con. I guess that biryiani is okay and maybe other things but the heat is making me dopey too and I care far more about Simon's state than my sugar intake. I give him my order. With the mother of all ear pain whitening his face and deadening his expression I am even more concerned and dash off using more energy reserves to find a room. Several door knocks later I score. The food goes down okay, its not a tour de force fro my guts and I wonder if there us silent sugar lurking. The situation is an unplanned emergency stop, so I don't beat myself with a stick, yet silently curse the ridiculousness of sugar in main meals everywhere. Chefs across the land may disagree and state that it is a necessary flavouring ingredient. I will research this too. Right now I just feel like a gambler with bad odds.
Back at our room I slug the tea and watch Simon sleep. I still don't know what is in it, but in the days when I took ecstasy it was the same story so I am not overly concerned. The tinctures follow like whisky chasers.
Day three has been a steadier one. I abandoned the baked beans in my breakfast, they had got amongst the egg, but the rest seemed safe and Simon didn't need to go to the emergency room at 3am so that was a huge bonus. Again its the best I can do for today. Another mediterranean style lunch and some river swimming and life's good. Apparently my shrieks of "cake!" and "chocolate!" have much reduced today and it feels like the cravings have eased a bit. The orchestral manoeuvres in my stomach seem to have abated within these first three days which is exciting but I will await for future developments. I don't want to get too excited just yet.

Day Two - Cake

In this month long journey I will attempt to track the history of our relationship with sugar; a few key facts and figures to start mapping out how this sweet, granular substance has become so pervasive in the modern diet. I once read that after consuming a teaspoon of sugar our immune system response dips significantly for around an hour. I'll be checking this fact out. I'll also try and find out some useful information about the economics of the sugar trade and the foods it finds its way into and why. I don't promise a thesis, just an insight into an area which is sometimes in the shade.
My initial hypothesis is this......Over use of sugar in the food stuffs available to us in the UK is causing significant mental and physical health problems for the nation, way over and beyond obesity.
I believe that although foods carry labels so we can make informed choices our shops and supermarkets are turning into libraries, as people, already confused by too much choice, hideously bright lighting and annoying announcements, try to decide what is best to put in their mouths. I believe sugar silently lurks and simply covers up low quality products on one hand and garishly blazes over the surface of others to tempt and allure. Maybe I'm just jealous. It is still only day two.
I look at my partner Simon. "Cake!" I say with intent. He looks at me with mild amusement. I can't remember what he says as my mind is on cake and entirely pre-occupied. This must be the cravings kicking in then. We need to visit a shop or two for food as we are going wild camping. At times I create tunnel vision using my hands to tune out various sweet treats on the shelves. Petrol stations are a disaster zone. I know let's jack up all the hot, tired drivers up on sugar and caffeine and send them out onto the nations roads! Brilliant. Viva Britannia. Performance fuel for cars seems the priority not performance fuel for people.
I look at Simon. "Chocolate!" I squeak and look at him wistfully. I adore dark chocolate. He offers some sympathy and some more humour. The cravings are regular today, luckily we are heading well away from civilisation to the coast path and sea swimming. Lunch snacks today include houmous, vine leaves, olives, tomatoes, goats cheese. All very lovely and certainly not as cheap as other gluten, dairy and sugary food stuffs. However in the UK we apparently spend a much smaller percentage of our income on food than some other nations, France for example. Supposedly they will invest up to 50% of their income on food, we Brits on average only up to 30%. Its a concession I have to make although I am on a low income, there is no other option that will help me through this. "Cake!" I pipe up, one last time. Simon looks at me and steers me down the street out of town. 

Day One - 'Erbs

Last night I spooned a miscellaneous herbal concoction into a cup and covered it with warm water. I left it overnight to brew. This morning I peer into the murky depths. The brew isn't really a secret. The label is just all written in Polish. Ewa promises to email me the details soon but for now it is a complete mystery. I frown at my cup with its weird alchemy within. It apparently tastes vile to some. Fortunately I'm not one of them. It is strong for sure and bitter. I decant it into a jar with a lid which will become my constant companion for a while. I decide to decorate it so its a feature. It looks like I am carrying my own urine around. It has to be drunk in 3 parts as it is pretty strong. I drop three different tinctures into my mouth in succession. The only way I can find to do this without getting it in my eye or on the floor is to hold up a small mirror to carefully count out my ten drops into my mouth each time. This will be done twice a day, I think, I got a little confused with the instructions. All these potions are acting to help removal of a blastocyst parasite and improve my emotional and physical health. I've never taken them before and the process comes on the strong recommendation of a good friend of mine. The test Ewa has run is a C.I.C (Controlled Internal Cleanse) test and without a word from me she has picked up on many areas of concern I have including some that she simply could not have known about. I am willing to engage with the process fully if it can help me to feel well at last.

With the 'erbs consumed I crouch down and frown into the fridge. I evict home made elderflower cordial, a cereal bar, mayonnaise, baked beans and pickled gherkins. They all contain sugar or honey. I check again later and realise the packet of beetroot is also a no-no. This surprises me. I cart it all to my sister's place as I hate food waste. The day passes quite quickly with family engagements and packing to get to Devon. Breakfast consisted of various raw veg and houmous and lunch was simply some nuts for now while I get used to all this. Evening meal involved chicken, potatoes and vegetables. I can see myself eating more like my grandparents with meat and two veg at this rate. Processed food is a minefield. In the pub I order a sparkling water and whilst I used to hate it it goes down OK. Later I order a tequila as this is apparently sugar free. I still hate this, so a dry month for me. Good job Glastonbury is over. A tentative first day but every journey starts with a single step. I am apprehensive but optimistic.

Prelude

If you have read Way Out East then you will be familiar with my mystery parasitic invader.
For those of you who are wisely enjoying a Pimms in the garden instead I'll fill you in.
Back in 2011 I took a trip to Sri Lanka and Nepal. A year prior to the trip I took a pledge that I would no longer buy plastic water bottles after learning about the dangerous floating plastic soup in the North Pacific that is the size of a continent. I took iodine with me, but for reasons best none to no-one it didn't make it into my water canteen every time and I took on an unscheduled hitch hiker. Or several thousand hitch hikers.
Two years later with the situation unresolved and yet undeterred  I am aboard a Megabus to London to discover more about my orchestral digestive workings and my general low energy levels and mood.
Prior to this excursion I lay in bed and decided that if I was going to take on the parasites I had better let them know the score first. It seemed only courteous. I decided that if I disagreed with wars outside of my body I shouldn't attempt to go staging one inside my body. So I lay down and told the parasites calmly that two years was a good innings and its been er....interesting and all...but that it was time to get ready to move on. The lack of luggage would help. I explained the housing conditions were likely to downgrade rapidly and that as we are experiencing a heatwave summer they should feel right at home, as they exited Sri Lanka in the first place in thirty degree heat. With no desire to send them written notification,  I fell asleep fairly sure they had heard the warning and were considering their position.
The focus of this blog, whilst I will update you on my thousand strong crowd of unexpected guests, is not parasites. It is unexpectedly sugar. After visiting London and collecting various tinctures and a strong herbal brew from my lady Ewa she suggested I give up wheat for the month I do the cleanse (I already did 7 years ago) and also sugar. She is treating Mr Parasite and other physical and emotional imbalances. This blog will chart the chequered journey of a life without sugar. This means no foods containing sugar, honey or fruit for one month. I already avoid gluten and dairy. It's going to be interesting journey.....